Sometimes I have to remind myself to "just breathe."  This probably sounds depressing, which it very well could be, but it isn't always sad.

It could be sad when I'm about to explode at my beautiful children and say things I don't really mean but I say to myself, "just breathe," and realize my oldest is only 4. Heck, he's still learning to be a functioning human being on this earth let alone the perfected, calm, settled being I expect him to be.

It could also be sad when it's 5 pm and my house is completely demolished and the kitchen looks like I had Thanksgiving dinner earlier, when in reality I went OUT for breakfast and lunch and have yet to make dinner.  I sometimes have to say to myself, "just breathe," and slowly but surely begin the never-ending process of cleanup before we mess it up again.

Life is full of these "just breathe" moments but it's more full of beautiful "just breathe" moments. In fact, a lot of times this reminder helps create the beautiful moments.

Moments when my 2 kids are wrestle hugging and enjoying each others company and I say, "just breathe," and take this moment in- don't go clean the kitchen.

Or when my husband and I are chatting for hours about our hopes and dreams and we haven't even been interrupted by our kiddlets for a solid hour, but all I can thinking of is the bakery deposits that haven't been done yet- and I say "just breathe," and enjoy this rare moment with your love.

Or when I wake up at 5 am and neither or my kids are next to me in bed and I haven't checked on them since I fell asleep at midnight and I really want to go check if they are both ok, but instead I remind myself, "just breathe" and I quickly drift into a restful couple hours more of sleep until they wake themselves.

I seem to be the type of person to rush to the next step, to make a list, to check off the next task, or complete the next job. Although it has to be a constant reminder, and even then I sometimes don't follow that reminder- I'm grateful for it.  Whether it is to stop me from reacting to a 4 year old tantrum or whether its to remind me to enjoy a beautiful moment in life, I'm grateful.  It reminds me to be true to myself and who I REALLY am. Who I was meant to be. Who I want to become.  To follow my inner compass telling me to enjoy my life. Love my family with every ounce of my being. JUST BREATHE.

Utah weekend

We came to Utah for General Conference and for Andy Olson to do some dental work for me.

Liam played in a canal while I raked some leaves on 2nd east.

We shot some clay pigeons.

Popps shared his vision with Bob about the shire.

Dani and Laur spent some quality time with each other.

As usual, I got a little homesick for the the mountains and the people here in northern Ut.